Am I the woman who you always wanted? Is my skin light enough for you?
Do I have good hair? Does my style reflect the way you believe a woman should dress? Do I have an attractive face and a toned body?
Before you answer, allow me to tell you how different opinions have affected me throughout the years. It started as a girl where family members, friends, and acquaintances shared their ideas of what beauty is. For some reason, I had a difficult time achieving several of their standards. As a result, I struggled to understand what beauty is, and it negatively affected my self-esteem. For years, I desired to achieve the standards of someone else. When others did not acknowledge or see my beauty, it affected how I felt in regards to myself. Honestly, I did not always believe I was beautiful. Now in my 20s, I realized I could not satisfy everyone's standards. What one person considered to be beautiful, another saw it as unattractive. I decided to define beauty standards based on my happiness and what allows me to stay true to myself. It is not always smooth, especially when there is constant pressure around you. However, I started learning that there is no point in being the woman who you always wanted if I am not the woman that I desire.