On the side of a building beside CAMH, in giant letters it says, "you've changed", and at first, I interpreted it as "you've changed man”, derogatory and while that interpretation is funny, as I went through the DBT program I shifted to seeing it and being relieved, and validating, encouraging and empowering. Thank God I've changed. I now know the voices doubting my validity or ability to create art among other things are absolutely full of shit. Even though they’ll never shut up, now I know I'm not the one full of shit for not shutting up right back about how they are wrong.
We need unconditional expression. Don't just do your makeup, paint your face, give others permission, be strong not just for yourself and your art but for everyone around you and for the sake of art. If you're scared no one does it and you'll look weird if you do it, then you can be one giving permission to others. Sing out loud while you're on walks, talk to the trees, if you're freaking out the normies you're doing it right and you're changing the world please don't stop. I want to create without obligation. I want to make art for myself and not for a standard to be worthy enough to be deemed a commodity. It’s not worthless because it’s not worthy to be a commodity.
I'm not Cydney. I'm not even Izzy. I am this amalgamation. In this moment and now I'm another and you are another and we are all constant new moments and that's all we have to be. I don't like my name. but I like my middle name. My middle name is Faith. Faith, I have a purpose. Faith that there's a reason. I have faith that the meek shall inherit the earth. And bitch artists are as meek as it gets so let's fucking take it back. I have faith we will.
-Cydney